Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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