So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
This baby is an asshole
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
