why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
