I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize