Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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