Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
