We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Damn victory sex feels great
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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