I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
