After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
