I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
