Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
smell my finger.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
