youre lurking in front of me
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
