i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I have peed in a lot of sinks
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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