i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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