so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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