god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
