dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Just high enough for therapy.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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