I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
