when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
