Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
