when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
