Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
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