Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
