Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Randomize