weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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