all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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