i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
