Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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