Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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