What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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