her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
