That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
