we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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