He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
