Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize
