At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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