I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
my poor anus
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize