when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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