My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
