whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Just puked most of my soul out..
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