I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Randomize
