I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
