its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Randomize
