sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
you are never too drunk for berry picking
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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