I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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