just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
