i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I party with great urgency now.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
