I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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