C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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