yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
